Friday, January 8, 2010

If my pets could talk...

Dear Amber,

If you could stop that filthy mongrel from eating my food, I would really appreciate it. Maybe you should feed him more food. He is obviously starving. Also, I understand you don't like it when I climb on the very tip top of your furniture and appliances (I love the top of the fridge!) but I have to escape that beast somehow, right? I mean, he is so persistent and is trying to be friends with me but, uh uhhhh, it's not happenin' sister! This pretty kitty does not socialize with dirty dogs.

Also, that guy that's been hanging around lately? I know he doesn't like me and you can let him know the feeling is mutual.

That's all.

Adoringly,

Libby

PS: That electric blanket gets a paw up from me. This winter is brutal!


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Dear Amber,

Thank you so much for taking me in, this home is a million times better than my last one. I don't know why they didn't like me, maybe it's because I eat a lot? Speaking of food, why can't we go to that one house with the nice older lady more often? She feeds me lot of treats and I like it. I especially like the Pupperoni, do you think you could pick those up the next time you're at the store? Also, speaking of food (it's all I think about) could you mix more of that canned food with my boring dried food? It makes it taste so much better. I promise I won't vomit all of your house again if you do. Speaking of vomit, remember yesterday when I threw up in the living room? I was in the kitty litter again. I am sorry.
I really wish that pretty white kitty would play with me. I mean, she keeps waving her paws at me and it seems like she's whistling at me. Is she playing some messed game of Hard To Get? I don't want that... ewwww, she's a CAT! I just want someone to play with when you're not home.

Lots of dog kisses,

Zeke

Oh, and don't forget the Pupperonis.



What would your pets say if they could talk?


12 comments:

Sam said...

aw, that was cute! they're both adorable.

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

Hehehehe, Libby is SOOOO freaking cute in that picture!! I love this. My mom had to cut a little kitty door in the closet where she puts her cats food so her monster of a golden lab wouldn't get in there and eat it!!

Shannon said...

I think my pets would've said some choice words to me when I made them go outside to tinkle! LOL

Perfectly Pleasant said...

haha, from the mouth of our four legged children... I'm not sure I'd want to know what he's thinking.

Lesli said...

You are hilarious!! That is about the same story at my house with the cat(s) and dog!

Cy ad LIbby don't like each other??!!!!

Lesli said...

P.S. Congrats on reaching 100 followers! That is my goal for 2010.

Mitsy said...

bahaha omgggg Zeke is precious!! (I'm not a cat person) my dog would probably say, "Look I stay here because you feed me but you're crazy and annoying. Leave me alone- I want to sleep." Great idea! I might actually do this one day!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Haha! I love this. Too funny!

Paige said...

such a great post! i would love to hear what my fat-cats would have to say about my dog. looking forward to reading more of your blog!

Michelle said...

We think our Kenai (the Siberean Husky) would have a total California surfer voice and tell us about his favorite napping spots. Oh, and when are we going to take him for a car ride so he can see his barista ladies at the coffee stand. They give him love and treats.

P said...

Too cute!!!

I wish I had a pet now, purely so I could imagine it talking...

d.a.r. said...

Hahahaha, so funny!!!!