Wednesday, September 19, 2012

On taking a breather...

Recently my friend Mandy wrote a post that really resonated with me. She wrote about stepping away from blogging and needing some time away to herself. This was during a time when she was just returning home to where she wanted to be, and when it seemed like she should be welcoming writing back into her life, it was not time.

I have to admit, I understand how she felt. I am feeling this way right now.

I want to write. I need to write.  I am bursting with stories and things to say, but as soon as I sit down to write... I am speechless. The posts I had begun to write in my head during the moment are gone.

My posts are forced and not natural. Many of them are not actually writing, they are really just memes (not writing in my book). This is not what I intend for my blog.

I want this to be a space where I share what is going on in my life, share my thoughts and opinions and engage with other readers and bloggers.

I look back at posts from when I first started blogging (many of them are not published anymore) and there has been a definite change in my writing style. A change that I am not very happy with.

A break is not what I want either, but I do think posts will continue to be sporadic in these parts. I wish that was not the case, but I just cannot handle everything I have taken on in the past year and still post as regularly as I was.

I think what will really help is getting back into journaling and writing just for myself. Perhaps if I write without an audience, write with only myself as the audience, the words will flow a bit more.

We'll see... ;) 

In the meantime, in true blogger fashion, I will bullet some of the things I have been up to that are keeping me busy!

  • I attended the coolest wedding I have ever been to last weekend. It was on a farm about an hour and a half northeast of Des Moines and the ceremony was literally in a cornfield. I really want to write about this wedding, and hopefully I can get to work on that soon. 
  • I am learning to knit and am in my second week of classes at a local vintage store. I'm definitely a slower learner, as I have never picked up knitting needles in my life, but I am really enjoying it! 
  • This week I watched a phenomenal documentary called Finding Kind, which spotlighted the girl bullying today from females of all ages. I do not think there was a dry eye in the house and it really made me appreciate the female friendships I have in my life. 
  • I took on a third job (I know, I knoooow). In addition to working for the agency and subbing (which is only one day a week this semester, so not much) I will be working for the I Have A Dream Foundation helping organize and administer an after school program at a local middle school. To say I am excited is an understatement! The IHAD Foundation is something I fell in love with as soon as I heard about it and I knew someday that I would be involved with this foundation. I just had no idea it would be so soon.
  • I'm still training for the Des Moines Half Marathon. This time around I have slacked majorly and have not been following my training schedule AT ALL. Sometimes I feel really guilty, but I am quickly reminded of just how much I have going on right now.
Bottom line. I enjoy being busy. I am at my best when I am really busy, I may have overdone it, but I'll get through everything. 

In the meantime, I am planning on taking a really deep breath and backing off from a few things that can be put on the backburner. I hate that the blog is one of them, but it is what it is.

What aspect of your life gets put on hold when things get too busy? For me it used to be working out, but I have tried hard to change that in the past year!


San said...

I can relate to this so much currently... I've taken a bit of a breather on my own blog too. It's not because of lack of ideas, but just time and peace of mind to sit down and write all the stuff that I want to write about.

I think you know that it's totally fine with me if you write here as much as little as you like... I'll always check back :)

Stephany said...

I had to do this often when I was in school because it just got too much between classes & homework & my part-time job so I totally get it -- although I think you are WAYYYY busier than I was, ha. It's always sad to have to put aside something you love to focus on other things but it's also what you have to do to help in the long run! Hopefully it will recharge and refresh you. :)

Lisa from Lisa's Yarns said...

I totally understand where you are coming from and it seems like all of us go through this at certain points of our life! I hope things calm down soon and you find your words as I will miss regular posts from you!

As far as half marathon training goes - if you aren't able to find the time to do the long runs, I would strongly encourage you to NOT do the race... I did not properly train for a half once and it was a HORRIBLE experience to run it under-trained! I am not saying that is the case for you, but make sure you are honest with yourself regarding whether your body is ready for it, or you will pay for it! :(

Kelly (She Wears a Red Sox Cap) said...

I definitely understand this... I kind of forget when I blogged last haha. Oops :) Oh well! It sounds like you have a lot of fun things going on right now though!

Anonymous said...

I will miss you but I totally understand! Good luck.

Becky said...

I think it's really good you're taking some time for yourself - you certainly have enough on your plate - and SO excited you started working with I Have a Dream!

Shoshanah said...

First, you absolutely CANNOT stop blogging. But now that that's out of the way, I completely get where you're coming from. I think as bloggers we've all gone through periods where it just doesn't feel like it's clicking. And I don't think there's something that fixes that, except at some point it'll all start to click again.

And as for what gets dropped, it's working out. I pretty much never do, and I know I should make it priority. But I guess I'd just rather be spending time "internet-ing" instead.

Kyria @ Travel Spot said...

I know your email address; it's not like you not blogging means not keeping in touch!

My blogging and READING go by the wayside. Sad. Next would be sleep, which is even worse. I always try to fit in fitness though. It keeps me sane!

Lesli said...

I went through this myself in December and then you saw what happened with my blog! Non-existent. But I am opposite of you right now--I think I am going to start mine up again! I think those ebbs & flows in blogging are just fine! See you next weekend. Love ya!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

I totally feel you. I have been having similar feelings before I moved and now that I'm trying to settle in it's been hard to find a rhythm and blog. I hope you won't stay gone for too long though!