2010 Recap

Another year down... It feels like everyone is saying this and I have to say it too. Where did 2010 go?! Holy moly, it was gone in the blink of an eye.

My 2010 had lots of ups and lots of downs. Let's recap, shall we?

January

In January I celebrated my birthday at a Color Party and was head over heels in love. This love would be short lived, but overall I was happy. Work was going fantastic, we had a great holiday season. I had a great staff and life was good. Reading through my posts made me smile and frown at the same time, which I am aware is not possible, but I did. I was so happy and optimistic, which made me smile. What made me frown was that I knew what was coming...

February

This is the month I made the decision to start grad school. I met with a woman at Drake (that would soon be my advisor) and figured out what to do to get this going. I had to take the Praxis and complete all the steps to the application process. Also in February I read a lot more, which I tend to do in the winter anyway because there isn't much else to do. I was still so "in love" and we celebrated Valentines Day with a yummy crab leg dinner. It was so much fun to make and I can't believe I haven't done it again with friends since then!

March

Ohhhh March. March was not a good month. The person I was so "in love" with turned out to be a complete douche bag. I am not exaggerating. We broke up. I found out he was married still. (Yes, not sure if I ever told you guys that). I could not believe I was so wrong about someone. What happened to my gut instinct? Other things came out about him through friends that blew me away. Love really is blind.

April

I did not blog much during this time period, which is very like me. Usually I want to talk about this stuff but for some reason I just walled myself off and had mini pity parties for myself every night. Yep, I did. ::hangs head in shame:: During this time I tried to find things that comforted me. Like my favorite books. I re-read American Wife and strangely... it made me feel a lot better. I love the character of Alice Lindgren and her outlook on life really soothed me. When I think about it now, it sounds weird but to each their own, right? :)

My friends help me cope with the breakup... drinking a boot at Hessen Haus (not by myself! I had help...)

May

Speaking of American Wife and former first lady Laura Bush, I picked up the new memoir by Laura Bush and eagerly devoured it. I found out that she was doing a signing in Kansas City and I knew I HAD to go. Am I ever glad I did ! She is wonderful in person. Such a sweet, charming lady. I feel so lucky to have been in her company even if for just a short time. I also had an extra copy of her book so I hosted a giveaway and gave my extra copy away!

June

June was a busy month! One of my close friends at work got married so we made the trip up to her hometown three hours away in NE Iowa to attend the wedding. It was small farm wedding and it was so much fun! I may live in Iowa but I am a city girl and am rarely on farms or drive on dirt roads. It was so nice to get away for a couple days! I also made a trip down to Kansas City to see one of my close friends that moved to Scotland four years ago! We had such a great time being tourists in Kansas City, which is funny because we have both lived in KC for several years! We spent a day at Worlds of Fun and then another day at Oceans of Fun. We shopped, ate, talked and had a wonderful time. We also rode one of the scariest rides I have ever ridden in my life. We even had it documented on a video that you can watch here! :)

July

July was another busy month! I made the trip to Kansas City again to see my aunt that was in town visiting from Nevada! We had a great time with family and I can hardly believe that I haven't been back since. Makes me sad :( In July I also started working at the nursing home in activities but would soon have to give that up due to classes and work. Sad face.

(Me, my sister, my aunt Linda and my aunt Caroline. We had a great couple of days together!)

August

This month marked one of the busiest months of the year for work. With kids back to school shopping and tax free weekend, we kept super busy! In the meantime I was preparing to begin work on my masters degree and could hardly contain my excitement! This month I also started dating a new guy, who would be great for awhile, but not long term material. This month we also had our annual friends weekend at the lake. It's one of my favorite weekends of the year and 2010 was no different!

(One of my favorite places on earth, Lake Okoboji!)

(One of my former assistants that comes back occasionally to help out. We decided to try on the merchandise...)

September

Classes were going great so far, I was experiencing the joys that is group work and realizing, "uhhhh, you're in education. Get used to it!" I was putting so much effort into my classes and not necessarily neglecting my job but not enjoying it at all. I really wanted to be putting that time and effort towards my degree and bettering myself. Things with the new guy were going well and we were having fun together!

October

Ahhh, October. I blogged a lot in October due to the 30 day challenge that I gave a good go at but ended up failing halfway. Life got the better of me. I joined a bowling league with the new guy and realized that I couldn't force myself to like bowling. I still hated it. The only good thing about bowling was that it was socially acceptable to drink while doing it. This would cause me to put on about 5 lbs of weight by the end of the year. Oh, joy. Other than that, not much else happened.

November

Ohhhh, holiday season. How I love to hate you. This year was tough because I knew I would be leaving my job soon. I registered for a full load of classes at the beginning of the month for the following semester and I knew the time was coming to turn in my notice. Before doing so I made sure to get all my ducks in a row so my boss couldn't "talk me out of it." She tends to be very pushy and I was afraid she would try her hardest to get me to stay. Luckily, she didn't. She could sense for quite a while now that I was unhappy and just wanted me to be happy. I was grateful she didn't push the issue and just accepted my resignation and was thankful for my lengthy six week notice that I wasn't required to give. Thanksgiving came and went, it was fun but unfortunately work was really beginning to ruin my holiday with the staffing issues I was having in my management team. As for the rest of the staff, they were doing great and handling the volume beautifully!

(The mall I work in when it opened at midnight on Black Friday. Total and complete utter chaos. Trust me. People are nuts. )

December

December, December, December. WhatAMONTH! Omg. I have never wished away a holiday like I did this year. I really let my circumstances ruin my holiday and I am angry at myself for that. Never again! This month I wrapped up my classes and got two A's. I officially have a 4.0 GPA, and I am going to try hardest to keep it. In December I also took a 20 hour weekend class to obtain my substitute teaching license and enjoyed the class immensely! I cannot wait to get into the classroom and make money doing what I really want to do. This month the new guy and I officially called it quits. Things were not progressing how I felt they should be and I just didn't see it going anywhere. He didn't take it too well, in fact, he deleted me from Facebook. ::Sad face:: I didn't want to not be friends with him, but leading him on was wrong. In the meantime I have less and less time at the ol' job and the countdown had begun! Christmas was fantastic but super short. It was my only day off that week (nice, huh?) and I was beyond exhausted.

I can't end the year without talking about a special puppy that has entered my sister and I's lives. Her name is Lexie and she is a dapple dachsund that has special needs. She is only about 6 months old, but she is deaf due to dapples breeding with dapples. My aunt fosters dogs that she rescues from euthanization and Lexie was one of them. We took her just to help our aunt a little about two months ago and we haven't given her back... something tells me she has found her forever home. :)

So, this was my year! Big things happened in 2010 and I believe even bigger things are happening in 2011. Have a happy and safe NYE. I love you all!

Jaded

You guys, I am so jaded, it is disturbing. My dislike for the general public is scaring me. A LOT.

Let me explain.

You all know I work in retail. 5 times out of 10, people are rude instead of nice. I have been treated like dirt so many times, I can't stand it. It makes it harder and harder to grin and bare it. With each passing day I do not want to go that extra mile to make somebody's day and I dislike people from the moment they walk in my store.

Instead of being grateful for their business like I should be, I'm irritated that they are in the mall and only want them to leave. It's like I'm waiting for the bad and not ever expecting the good.

Today we had this woman in the store that was shopping with a $50 giftcard. Her 10 year old daughter was hanging on to the card and thought she had put it in her pocket. It must have fallen out because a few minutes later her mother was fah-reak-ing out. I'm talking tears and snapping at us to start looking for her giftcard. About five of us started frantically looking for it (in the mean time the line for the cash registers is out the door) and we have no luck. I ask her if I can take her name and number and call her if it turns up and she wasn't having that. It seemed anything I said to her was just awful. She wasn't feeling me at all. She did however love the girl that I have just for holidays. (She IS a total sweetheart). So, I let her handle the situation under my watchful eye. I gave her the number for our customer service to freeze the giftcard and hopefully re-issue a new one.

In the meantime, I was fuming. Why wasn't I good enough to help? Do I have a stamp on my forehead that says dumb blonde? I have felt this resistance from people for a long time now. A long time.

I think it's only getting worse and I'm really dumbfounded by it... but as time passes it is becoming clearer and clearer. I'm not happy and it's so obvious. I don't smile with my eyes and although I am sincere about doing my job, I don't really care. Ya know? I just don't. I wish I did, but I don't feel like I am doing anything that is impactful and worthwhile.

I don't feel like I'm making a difference. At my old job (which to some it would look very similar to the company I'm at now, but trust me, it's not) I felt like I was making a difference. I was making a little girls day. I was making someone smile. I don't do that now. It's not really possible (in the same sense) yeah it's fun making your sales plan and getting that bonus, but does a bonus really change who you are? How you look at life?

Nope, it doesn't. The money runs out and you're still the same person (just better dressed).

So, I had a wake up call today. It's not that I sincerely do not care about these people, I care. I'm just not motivated to go out of my way because... well, they probably wouldn't do the same for me.

I wish I didn't feel so "what's in it for me" but I guess that is why I am getting out now.

So, I'm sure I'm doing the right thing and hopefully I won't be so jaded anymore!

Have you ever felt this way towards the general public? How did you snap out of it?

PS: Our customer service center is working on the giftcard issue for the lady. Hopefully they can re-issue a new one. She ended up apologizing for freaking out and wanted to get all our name to write a letter to our home office. So, hopefully we get some recognition for putting up with a little crazy today... :)

Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas, Blogland!

Last night my family had our new(ish) Christmas Eve tradition that I am beginning to love more and more each year. On Christmas Eve my sister and I head over to my parents house for a tasty crab leg dinner with Bailey's to drink (yum, yum, yum) and then open all our presents from each other!

Sometimes I think my mom forgets that my sister and I are not little kids anymore and that I am 28 and my sister is 24 because she buys us so much stuff and wraps each one individually and wants pictures of us opening them. It is hilarious - and I love it!

She went a little nuts this year too. We both made out like bandits. I'm not going to lie, I feel a little guilty! My sister and I took care of them too though. For my mom, we got her a little 19 inch flatscreen tv for her kitchen and for my dad, we got a Nook Color. (Which I now desperately want! More on that later...)

I'm sure once we start having kids she will transfer all that energy to the kids, which will be just fine by me. I cannot wait for the day when we have little ones running around. It'll be awhile so in the meantime I will relish in her love of gift giving. :)

Hope you all are having a wonderful holiday with your friends and family! Travel safe and be merry! :)

Ch..ch...ch...changes!

As things are winding down at work I figured I would get a little sad, but... I am not. In fact, more and more things are happening that are frankly... pissing me off.

For instance, I told my boss about four weeks ago. I gave her a six week notice (very generous imo) and she asked me not to tell anyone. I told a few girls in my store, and it got around my store but other than that, nobody else in the district. I assumed she didn't want me to tell anyone because there are two other stores in my market and to get my store would be considered a promotion, so I am sure she figured those two would be interested.

Well, I figured I would get a warning when she was going to tell everyone. She usually announces on a conference call if someone is leaving, usually on their last call with everyone. Well, I have a little over two weeks left and I guess she decided to announce it yesterday on our call. I was completely blindsided. I couldn't believe it. Then she announced that I was leaving to go be a substitute teacher.

That's it.

Seriously?! SERIOUSLY!?

I hate women and how snotty and catty they can be. Maybe I shouldn't take it as a dig, but I am not going to JUST BE A SUBSTITUTE TEACHER. She did not have to say it like that. I will give her tiny bit more credit back, she did mention that that was what I was studying and I am going to go do what I really love to do, but still. A little heads up would've been nice.

Then she told everyone to reach out to me and say goodbye. I haven't heard from anyone, but I don't really expect to. It's Christmas, we're all busy. Plus, I'm friends with several of them on FB so I'm sure they will see what I am doing from my posts on there.

Then, to really put the icing on the cake.... the assistant manager from one of the other stores (the store with the manager that really wants my position) was in my store and mentioned how her manager should get this store so she can whip it into shape.

SAY WHAAAAAAAT?!

Ummm, no. My store IS in shape. We make our numbers. I rarely have staffing issues. We're the 2nd busiest store in the region out of 109 stores. She has no idea what she is talking about. So... at first I wanted to confront that other store manager, but you know what? Not getting the promotion will be enough slap in the face. I've been doing this too long to not know what that means. If I was in her position and didn't get that promotion I would be pissed.... so... there ya go.

PLUS... on top of it all, pretty much everyone in my store plans on staying once I leave and they don't want that store manager to come over. She never gets her schedules posted on time and is always lazing around in her office. (Don't ask me how they know all this stuff, they just do! Those little girls... they all talk talk talk!) Would you be pissed if your schedule for the following week wasn't posted the day before the week starts? Yeah? Me too.

So, overall I am not sad. I am beyond ecstatic. I know good things are coming in 2011 and I can't wait.

Why is gratitude so hard for some?

All the Christmas gifts are bought, the decorations are up, travel plans have been made, my cooking plans are set... Now, we just need Saturday to get here (and stay here!).

This week at work we have been busy setting up for the clearance sale that begins on Christmas Eve and continues through December to prepare for all the new Spring goods we're getting. With each passing day I get more and more excited. Excited to leave. Some people have questioned that I am going to miss it a little bit. Perhaps, but what I won't miss is the struggle to manage people.

My newest assistant manager is extremely difficult. She runs out of work at the drop of a hat and lately I am beginning to wonder if she is only working so that she can get further assistance from the state. I am not against assistance to people in need at all, but what I am against is people that milk the system. People that don't work hard on top of it and take every hand out they can possibly get. It really gets me going. I work very hard and have been working since I was 14 years old (with the exception of the first semester of my freshman year of college) and I have always worked very hard. To see other people skate by with hardly any effort... frankly, that pisses me off.

The funny thing is... These people actually think they work really hard and slam me because of my age and where I am at. Really? Do you think I was literally just handed everything? No, I worked my schedule. I worked while sick, I worked while battling personal issues at home, I didn't slack off... Those things do not go unnoticed (usually!).

It may sound like I'm judging people, and maybe I am. Maybe there are more facts to learn regarding a certain person's situation. But, after helping a person out so many times without even a thank you. That gets wearing and honestly, makes me not even care. Which is where I am. I don't care.

I have 18 days left of this responsibility and I am going to do my job just as I always have. But, I'm done caring. It gets me nowhere. Maybe I am moving into another thankless industry by going into education, but I don't think so. Maybe that is naive, but I really don't think so.

This post wasn't meant to be whiny, but I'm afraid it came off that way! Thank you for reading, as usual the blogging community always makes me feel better.

Ten on Tuesday

Can you believe it's December 21?? Two more years till the end of the world... Haha, just kidding. The movie 2012 really freaked me out, so hopefully it's not.

Well, I am off today and I couldn't be happier. I have absolutely nothing written on my to do list besides lounge around and relax. I. Need. It. Work is driving me absolutely, positively crazy. Working with all girls is enough to make you insane. It's true.

On with Ten on Tuesday!

1. Do you do any volunteer work?

I haven't really done any volunteer work in my lifetime besides the philanthropies that my sorority participated in. Hopefully I can start volunteering more once I am in school full time. There are always tutoring opportunities being emailed about, so maybe I can accept a couple of those. There's a girl that was in one of my classes that volunteers a TON so maybe I can connect with her as well. (Clearly, I feel guilty huh!? lol)

2. Do you have night and/or morning ritual?

Yep. In the mornings I do just about the same thing everyday...

1. Pee 2. Heat up Keurig 3. Take dogs out 4. Start brewing coffee 5. Hop in the shower 6. Dress and dry hair 7. Take dogs out again (I know) and start my car (it's cold!) 8. Do my makeup 9. Pack lunch and eat breakfast 10. Take off! I like to have an hour and half to do all these things but due to the snooze I usually have an hour.

3. Would you rather exercise or diet? Why?

I would rather diet because I hate exercising. I have tried to stir a love for running and other sports but it hardly ever lasts. :(

4. If you would rather exercise, do you prefer going to a gym or working out at home?

I've tried both. I have multiple work out dvd's. I have a gym membership that I pay $30 a month to but haven't used in MONTHS. Ridiculous, right?!

5. What do you think is a huge waste of time?

Talking on the phone. I am not a phone talker. I hate it. I would much rather text or talk in person.

6. What is one way you save time?

I am your typical multi-tasker. Although, I learned last week that our brains do not multi task. They toggle back and forth between activities.So, I guess I am a good toggler and it saves me lots of time!

7. What is your current obsession?

Shopping. I just can't stop. There are such good deals EVERYWHERE and I can't stop buying stuff. I'm shopping BECAUSE I have a coupon. Their evil plan is working on me...

8. What is a current obsession you can’t wait to pass?

Hmmm... I honestly cannot think of anything! I know there are things out there but I'm drawing a blank. I used to hate jeggings and leggings but I have totally jumped on that bandwagon and love them. I also used to hate the look of boots over jeans but now I'm loving that too.

9. Are you currently reading a book? If so, what book? Would you recommend it?

I am reading Breakfast at Tiffany's by James Patterson and it is really good! I would recommend it. I'm trying to hurry up and finish it because I have the Lifetime movie of it with Alyssa Milano saved on my DVR. The girls at work saw it on my desk and were squealing that I will love the movie. Haha, so I'm kinda excited now. :)

10. Since we had the 90s question last week, what’s your favourite songs from 00′s?

Ooooh, gosh. I think probablyTik Tok by Kesha! I love her!

Now, go participate in Ten On Tuesday!!!

Christmas cuteness

Excuse the poor Blackberry photo, but I just had to share! Isn't she adorable?! I put the tree up today and Lexie immediately crawled underneath it and fell asleep!

And, yes I am using an ISU throw for a tree skirt. Resourceful, no? :)

Hope you're all having a fantastic weekend!